{"id":8135,"date":"2021-01-05T08:00:41","date_gmt":"2021-01-05T08:00:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/?p=8135"},"modified":"2025-06-12T20:04:58","modified_gmt":"2025-06-12T20:04:58","slug":"coming-to-the-uk-in-2022-honest","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/?p=8135","title":{"rendered":"Random Things I Think Could Come To The UK In 2022 (This Is A Jokey Post)"},"content":{"rendered":"

So I thought I\u2019d share a light-hearted blog post after last nights announcement. I hope you laugh as much as I did writing these out (with some help from Ant, of course).\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Alton Towers New Planning Application:<\/span><\/h2>\n

It seems Big Bob is expected to receive an upgrade and receive some whopping pair of guns (arms) for the next season. I believe they will feature special elements and will become flame throwers to enhance the overall fire aspect of the ride.\"\" <\/span><\/p>\n

Flamingo Land is Getting A Rebrand:<\/span><\/h2>\n

It turns out that 2022 will see Flamingo Land renamed to Pigeon Land. The park has decided that Flamingos are far too mainstream for 2022 & are hoping the new name will be bringing in a wilder range of audiences. Side note bread crumbs are banned from the park as of next season.\"\"<\/span><\/p>\n

Chessington World of Adventures Zoo Rentals Go Live:<\/span><\/h2>\n

It seems Chessington are planning on renting their goats to those who fancy having the bragging rights about owning a Chessy goat for 5 nights for a bargain price of \u00a375. Unfortunately, there\u2019ll be no annual pass discount & no food included<\/strong>, it\u2019s recommended you visit your local farm shop to buy their food prior to going ahead with this rental. Disclaimer: do not feed after midnight.\"\" <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Exclusive Dialling\/Competition Available at Blackpool Pleasure Beach:<\/span><\/h2>\n

By the sounds of things Pleasure Beach will be allowing visitors to dial a seagull to receive their chips back which has been pinched. Just visit guest services during your visit to give them a call (please don\u2019t actually do this lol<\/strong>). Keep a look out for the golden chip to bag yourself a ride on Valhalla once it reopens (T&Cs apply).\"\" <\/span><\/p>\n

Amity Cove\/Stealth Receives A Ford Sponsorship: <\/span><\/h2>\n

A brand new IP is set to feature over at Amity Cove. It looks like stealth will be themed to Ford and the carriages will feature a Ford Fiesta themed. Alongside this brand new re-theme we can expect Ford World rather than Ferrari World, which will have smaller attractions installed including fill your car & change your window wipers. As well as these changes the speed will be matching the National speed limit & seat belts are essential else you will receive a fine.\"\"<\/span><\/p>\n

The New Queen Of Speed Taking Over The Dark Forest:<\/span><\/h2>\n

Not many agree that Rita was pretty decent as it stands. So Alton Towers have gone all out for the 2022 season & Rita will be renamed to BeatHer and the speed will increase by 1mph (to match the name of course).\"\" <\/span><\/p>\n

Thorpe Parks Brand New Dry Ride:<\/span><\/h2>\n

Now that my RMC blog post I shared the other day is almost irrelevant as Thorpe Park have their next ride planned already. A brand new worlds first water ride to feature no water. I think the ride’s slogan is either say no to water or say no ponchos (TBC).<\/strong>\u00a0\"\" <\/span><\/p>\n

Infusion\u2019s Smoothing Project:<\/span><\/h2>\n

Commonly known as one of the roughest UK rollercoasters. Well not anymore, as of 2022 it\u2019ll receive brand new wheels which will be square shaped to allow a smoother ride experience..\"\"<\/span><\/p>\n

Well, I have chuckled all the way through writing & creating these images. I also hope you guys also joined me in having a little laugh.\u00a0<\/span>I\u2019d love to hear some of your guys wildest & unrealistic (that definitely will NEVER<\/strong> come true) theories in the comments or across my socials! <\/span><\/p>\n

Thank you so much for reading this utter ramble of crap haha!\"\"<\/span><\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

So I thought I\u2019d share a light-hearted blog post after last nights announcement. I hope you laugh as much as I did writing these out (with some help from Ant, of course).\u00a0 Alton Towers New Planning Application: It seems Big Bob is expected to receive an upgrade and receive some whopping pair of guns (arms) for the next season. I believe they will feature special elements and will become flame throwers to enhance the overall fire aspect of the ride. Flamingo Land is Getting A Rebrand: It turns out that 2022 will see Flamingo Land renamed to Pigeon Land. The park has decided that Flamingos are far too mainstream for 2022 & are hoping the new name will be bringing in a wilder range of audiences. Side note bread crumbs are banned from the park as of next season. Chessington World of Adventures Zoo Rentals Go Live: It seems Chessington are planning on renting their goats to those who fancy having the bragging rights about owning a Chessy goat for 5 nights for a bargain price of \u00a375. Unfortunately, there\u2019ll be no annual pass discount & no food included, it\u2019s recommended you visit your local farm shop to buy their food prior to going ahead with this rental. Disclaimer: do not feed after midnight. Exclusive Dialling\/Competition Available at Blackpool Pleasure Beach: By the sounds of things Pleasure Beach will be allowing visitors to dial a seagull to receive their chips back which has been pinched. Just visit guest services during your visit to give them a call (please don\u2019t actually do this lol). Keep a look out for the golden chip to bag yourself a ride on Valhalla once it reopens (T&Cs apply). Amity Cove\/Stealth Receives A Ford Sponsorship: A brand new IP is set to feature over at Amity Cove. It looks like stealth will be themed to Ford and the carriages will feature a Ford Fiesta themed. Alongside this brand new re-theme we can expect Ford World rather than Ferrari World, which will have smaller attractions installed including fill your car & change your window wipers. As well as these changes the speed will be matching the National speed limit & seat belts are essential else you will receive a fine. The New Queen Of Speed Taking Over The Dark Forest: Not many agree that Rita was pretty decent as it stands. So Alton Towers have gone all out for the 2022 season & Rita will be renamed to BeatHer and the speed will increase by 1mph (to match the name of course). Thorpe Parks Brand New Dry Ride: Now that my RMC blog post I shared the other day is almost irrelevant as Thorpe Park have their next ride planned already. A brand new worlds first water ride to feature no water. I think the ride’s slogan is either say no to water or say no ponchos (TBC).\u00a0 Infusion\u2019s Smoothing Project: Commonly known as one of the roughest UK rollercoasters. Well not anymore, as of 2022 it\u2019ll receive brand new wheels which will be square shaped to allow a smoother ride experience.. Well, I have chuckled all the way through writing & creating these images. I also hope you guys also joined me in having a little laugh.\u00a0I\u2019d love to hear some of your guys wildest & unrealistic (that definitely will NEVER come true) theories in the comments or across my socials! Thank you so much for reading this utter ramble of crap haha!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":8144,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[5053,5054],"tags":[2982,2976,2975,2974,1233,1585,2978,2977,2983,2742,904,402,701,434,1976,2980,2979,1540,2981,2973],"class_list":["post-8135","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-theme-parks","category-themed-attractions","tag-a-joke","tag-a-laugh","tag-banter","tag-far-from-the-truth","tag-fun","tag-funny","tag-funny-theme-parks","tag-light-hearted","tag-little-laughter","tag-new-experiences","tag-new-rides","tag-theme-park-blogger","tag-theme-parks","tag-travel-blogger","tag-travel-girl","tag-uk-2022","tag-uk-banter-theme-park","tag-uk-theme-parks","tag-uk-theme-parks-2022","tag-unrealistic"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/01\/A6F76D02-C153-40FA-85D7-AA0CA057B411-e1609802926289.png?fit=400%2C400&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pb4qDv-27d","jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8135","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=8135"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8135\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9567,"href":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8135\/revisions\/9567"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/8144"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=8135"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=8135"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coastersonthecoast.co.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=8135"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}